QotD: “I’m anti-kink because dangerous behavior does not become ethical with the addition of orgasms”

are you anti kink? why is that? incredibly curious

I’m anti-kink because dangerous behavior does not become ethical with the addition of orgasms. If your kink is watching someone smoke, I don’t give a shit, but if you eroticize violence and power disparities, or promote real-world power disparities through misogynist, homophobic, or racist sex games, you need to do some serious self-evaluation.

I’m anti-kink because I, myself, spent a long time accepting an attraction to power disparity as part of my own sexuality and my own involvement with older men has fucked me up to this day. I am anti-kink because stepping back and examining why I wanted what I wanted has been better for me than any aspect of sex-positivity has ever been, and now from the outside I am just tired of other people’s refusal to examine themselves. It’s not that hard.


It becomes ethical with consent and discussion . That’s it. (Also smoking IS dangerous behavior uh..)
Your personal experience can be fuel for you to change yourself and the way you have sex but don’t you dare try to project that onto other people and try to discount attraction that other people have to their kinks.
If someone is attracted to something considered unethical I’m pretty fucking sure they’ve examined why they want that and put some thought into it. These are things that stay within a group of people and are practiced with consent and done carefully, this is your refusal to examine other people.
There are plenty of kinks that I completely baffled by why it’s desirable, even some that make me feel a little sick, but oh my fucking god it is not my place to judge them based on my inability to feel the same and my inability to understand.

“It becomes ethical with consent and discussion.”

Cool so if we discuss me killing and eating you and you consent to me doing it, I can ethically kill you and eat you?

What does that have to do with this? You knew that isn’t what I’m talking about get outta here

You literally said kinks that harm others become ethical because of consent and discussion. There are people with cannibalism kinks. Of course it’s relevant to what you’re saying.

Next Years Girl

Big sighs you are not understanding

She deleted this rather than explaining what I’m “not understanding” or why she’s refusing to answer a simple question based on her premise. That was boring.

Next Years Girl

3 responses

  1. The “addition of orgasms” rhetoric has always left me kind of confused (because of this). I think kink criticism is stronger when it doesn’t presume all kink is sexual.

  2. Honestly, so what? Some people ‘get off’ in an emotional sense, they are putting their emotional satisfaction before the welfare of other people.

    Like dog fighting – do you think dog fighting is ok because men aren’t literally masturbating to it?

  3. Which is pretty much what the person being quoted in the blog you linked to is saying:

    So I’m not even sure what your point is, it’s not like this is the only anti-BDSM post on this blog.

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